This was Tony. HE hadn’t kissed lightly or softly or anything of the sort. Had Stephen drawing in a sharp breath as he pulled back and felt his lip being bit. “Tony. Tony, stop. Do you know what you’re doing?”
Tony and his defense mechanisms… Honestly. “That conversation would need me to be quite drunk, Tony.” He had tried to fight against joining the war after all. Finding someone during that impossibly long stretch of time when he’s still been young and naive…. He ran a hand through his hair before he stood up once more. “For the one involving you and I.”
Slowly, he rose to his feet and moved to stand in front of the other man. Looking minutely down into his eyes. “I would never put you in the same category as past experiences. You… are particularly indefinable.” He gave the slightest smile. “But I expect you know your own mind. Simply remember that I am open to the possibility.”
Antonio blinked once, then huffed and looked up to Stephen “Okay, now I’m confused. You say you’re open to the possibility, but you don’t want me to be one of your regrets? That kind of implies you don’t want to be with me because I’m too much of a pain and a risk and you’ll regret being with me and … I … if it’s any consolation, you won’t have much time to regret anyway seeing as I’m a dying man! But … look, I get it. I’m a fucking mess. I drink too much, I constantly stink of booze, sick and chemo drugs. It’s not a great cocktail of smells no matter how much I shower, I know. No one in their right fucking mind would want to be with me unless they think they can get something out of it, like my money or whatever… even then she could barely bear it but she was a great actress after all…” Tony trailed off in his angry sudden rant, then turned away “I need a drink…” He muttered and headed for his spirits cabinet.